Sunday, November 20, 2011

Why do people have to leave each other?

I've read this article numerous times now.  There's a lecture version which I play on my iphone and fall asleep to.  The very first time I discovered this lecture was when one of my facebook friends posted it.  I was fasting at the time and it was close to iftar so I was stripped down to my basic human need of starvation and thirst.  

Within the first ten minutes I was bawling crying.  I couldn't believe that someone knows exactly my struggle and was able to very eloquently put it into words and communicate it.  It was such a relief to know I wasn't the only one.  Like Yasmin I'm also one of those that gets very attached to people.  I always had to have a best friend.  My free days always had to involve hanging out with people.  I always had a boy in mind whether it was an actual relationship or just a fantasy in my head.  I was always so dependent on my relationships with people.  When anything of significance happened to me I needed to talk to someone about it.  I get attached easily and I get hurt easily. I was very dependent on my friendships.

Yasmin relates her emotional vulnerability to that of a vase that keeps falling and breaking.

But the problem wasn’t with the vase. Or even that the vases kept breaking. The problem was that I kept putting them on the edge of tables.

 Listening to this lecture forced me to confront this and the first time it was overwhelming.  I cried for a long time.   The point of the article is the powerful message that she reiterates.

There is only one place where we can lay our dependencies. There is only one relationship that should define our self-worth and only one source from which to seek our ultimate happiness, fulfillment, and security. That place is God.

This might be the most important piece of wisdom I was given.  I listen to this lecture when I need the reminder.  This week I listened to it about 5 times.

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